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Tuesday, July 22, 2008

Let's Say Goodbye

I'm not mad that you won't talk to me anymore. I'm not even sad. I just feel bad. Not at having lost you. There wasn't anything left to lose, was there?

I feel disappointed though that you didn't even attempt to fight for me. It's not even you actually. This wasn't something I could've won anyway. Winning is when something might be considered yours. I despair because I've been on both sides of the fence and neither time did I have the felicity of being fought for.

Not your fault however. Or your responsibility. You did what you had to and Im not going to hold that against you. I'm not that girl. I won't try to force my way into where I'm not needed nor welcome. I will not try to resurrect what was. Because I know when something is over. And I'm wise enough to know that trying will not bring it back. And the end of something isn't always a cause for mourning. Sometimes it's just what was before something else came along. Something that isn't necessarily better, but just is. It's just different.

So I shall not mourn, or pine. I shall not spend quiet evenings pondering over what went wrong and what could have been different. Because nothing went wrong nor could it have been different. It was what it was meant to be. I shall not miss you. Not really. But I shall think of you. Not often — but I shall.

I do wish however that you had found it in you to have simply stated the end, said goodbye, rather than disappear without a word. Not because you owe me an explanation. You do not. And not because I don't understand why. But because saying goodbye was the thing to have done.

Goodbye summer.

We were the cloud shape that lasted a few moments before the wind blew it away.



Now it's you to yours and me to mine,
And like that, we shall be just fine.

17 comments:

  1. Oh how I long for summer!
    Only if I could express myself like this (Sigh).

    "And the end of something isn't always a cause for mourning."
    Beautiful...

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  2. Good bye summer? That's what the whole thing was about?

    Phew! almost got me worried that something terrible has happened.

    Grrrrrr!!!!

    Superbly well written BTW :-)

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  3. hehehheheh
    loovvvleeeeeeeeeee

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  4. beautifully written!

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  5. Zephyr: You only have to attempt!

    alwayshappykya: ummm, summer was only an allusion, a euphemism as it may be. This actually was goodbye to someone, but I've gotten it out of my system now :) And thank you very much!

    la vida loca: :) thanks!

    anu: Thanks! and welcome here!

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  6. The Wheel of Time turns, and Ages come and pass...

    Sorry, too much WoT ;)

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  7. I love this whole metaphorical post.

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  8. akka...
    just one season ditches u and u write like this...abbha...sooper...!!!

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  9. Aren't you quite the tease!!

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  10. Relationships....like changing seasons,sometimes cold,sometimes hot,then a fall.Well...gotta live still.Hugs.

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  11. I want summer. My hands are frozen and I can't feel my nose.

    I so want summer.

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  12. OMG! such drama!!! I believed what you lead us to believe, wondering where your characteristic humor went and was preparing myself to admire your strength. :) Very well written!

    And goodbye summer already?

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  13. Amey: And so it happens :)

    Rambunctious whippersnapper: Glad you liked it!

    Silk smitha and disco shanthi: Thanks tamma... this isn't season ditching though... it's seasonal ditching :)

    I love lucy: Umm... thanks? Does that make me an attention seeker as well?

    Sree: I think you're the only one who got it :) Very true, gotta live on.

    Silvara: May I recommend moving to Africa? My geography sucks btw so maybe my recommendation is all wrong!

    Never mind: Uhh... thanks! Drama indeed, but definitely real. And am very flattered you think I'm humorous! Summer's slowly fading here... i think.

    Everyone, check the edit, I think I've overdone the metaphors.

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  14. Hmmmm... looks more like something more than just innocent summer...
    My senses are numbed!
    But beautifully written!!

    Cheers

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  15. Not at all.
    I loved the way you chose a metaphor to pour out your feelings ever so subtly.
    It was beautifully written :)
    I hope writing it all down was therapeutic *hugs*

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  16. whencutdeep: aha! Neat nickname there!! It was more, thanks for the compliment :)

    I love lucy: Thanks :) I guess sometimes one needs to test the waters before diving in and subtlety helps in these matters. *hug*

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